I used to believe that "skinny" was bad. It wasn't "healthy" and that "skinny" people should eat a sandwich!
Similarly, I was sad that "large" people were clearly not taking care of their bodies and allowing them to simply be large, fat, or overweight.
What I know now is that IT. DOESN'T. MATTER. I have lots of friends who are super tiny and lots of friends who have a whole lotta curves to love, and you know what? I love them. This article "Is Staying Thin Easy? It Doesn't Matter" came up on my facebook feed today. Previously I would have probably just scoffed and kept scrolling, but today I stopped, clicked through and read it.
I credit the things I choose to read in helping me change how I think about bodies, I credit kind and gracious friends who quietly come up to me and let me know that the skinny shaming comment I just unthinkingly made hurt them. I, like many women, fell into the Body Mass Index lie and the desire to be "fit" which in my head went something like this: Fit=skinny=desirable by society/boys.
Fitness is different for each and every person. Some people have an extremely difficult time exercising, changing diet, etc for a variety of legitimate reasons. Some people over-exercise and look unhealthy so they can fit into the lie social media spoon-feeds us that we all need to look a certain way.
Truth is, you need to look like YOU! I am 5'5", 180lbs and could do with some cardio. My BMI (lie) claims I am obese and need to be around 140lbs. That my friends is bullshit. 140 was a number I hit in high school when I was 18, to go back down to that now I would need to seriously lose a bunch of muscle and all over body fat. I, and both personal trainers that I have had the pleasure of meeting, think this is crazy. 155-165 is a better range for me on average.
Do I have the time to go work out a lot right now? Not really. Am I going to feel bad for eating a hamburger and enjoying a beer? Absolutely not. It has taken me a long, long time to fall in love with this amazing body of mine, and I am still learning how to love myself. I worry over how my body will change after I have kids, will I want a breast reduction? Will my fiancee still love me? It's easy to spiral downwards into a hole of self-loathing.
The most healthy thing, the best diet, the most vigorous excercise you can do for yourself? Teach yourself to Love You! Look at your body, look at your curves, or your slender frame and tell yourself that it is beautiful. Love your stretch marks, love your bony hips or your nubby spine. Love your curvy hips, tiny waist. Love your wide shoulders and strong thighs. Love yourself. Find someone who genuinely loves you for, (wait for it,) YOU! Don't settle for less.
This is plus-size model Tess Munster and I think she is fabulous! I love how she unashamedly loves her chubby body, and how she unapologetically flaunts what she's got for all the world.
Tumblr blogger RottenMorgue is the opposite of Tess. Skinny, bony, and adorable, she makes a living flaunting her adorably weird little self in private video chats. I'm including her here partially because I love how wacky she is, and partially because I can't think of a better example of skinny.
The list goes on...
people who work out all the time...
people who don't.
(yes, this is me, sorry Mom!)
Everyone is beautiful.
Learn to Love You!